So, here's the deal. This is what Chad had to live up to during his formative years, actually during his first year at BYU. Pam actually had them printed up and gave them to him. I thought I'd share them with you. They are hilarious. Put these together with Candy's list and you have perfection.
1. Thou shalt be home by midnite because the Holy Ghost goes to be then. Nothing good happens after midnite.
2. Thou shalt not say pis-, cra-, frick--, freak-- or bosom.
3. Thou shall wear thy seatbelt always.
4. Thou shalt not drive over 65 mph..the Lord can't protect thee if thou art breaking the law.
5. Thou shalt get thy hair.
6. Thou shalt brush thy teeth twice a day every day.
7. Thou shalt not talk on thy cell phone to girls after 1am.
8. Thou shalt be conscious of what you text, say and write because Satan see and hears everything.
9. Thou shalt always say, "Please and Thank you" and be grateful.
10. Thou shalt not tell lies. Thou has to remember too many details and will come back to bite thee in the buttocks
11. Thou shalt not gamble or play cards on tv, online.
12. Thou shalt be judicious on myspace and facebook. Remember everyone can read everything thou dost write.
13. Thou shalt always open doors for girls.
14. Thou shalt remember that the grass is always greener on the other side because it has more manure on it...and it still has to be mowed.
15. Thou shalt have a prayer in thy heart always. Pray morning and night and anytime in between...especially before a test.
16. Thou shalt not have a steady girlfriend...spread the joy.
17. Thou shalt remember that choice, not chance, determines destiny.
18. Thou shalt remember that what thou thinkest thou art and what thou wilt become.
19. Thou shalt be where thou art supposed to be when thou art supposed to be there.
20. Thou shalt not be alone with girls.
21. Thou shalt keep thy dorm room clean.
22. Thou shalt wash thy sheets at least once a month.
23. Thous shalt not walk around in thy underwear.
24. Thous shalt attend all devotionals and firesides and take notes.
25. Thou shalt write in thy journal weekly.
26. Thou shalt write a letter or email to thy parentals once a week so the female parental can save it for thy scrapbook.
27. Thou shalt get 8 hours of sleep every night.
28. Thou shalt not eat junk food too often.
29. Thou shalt exercise daily.
30. Thou shalt read and study thy scriptures daily.
31. Thou shalt never see R-rated movies...ever.
32. Remember who thou art at all time and in all places.
33. Thou shalt remember the Pammandments because I saith and meaneth it and I loveth thee. I want thee to be the best thee can be.
Saturday, July 21, 2007
Nobody comments anyway!
Okay, I'm doing another post. I tell Candy to post and she just gets mad at me. I tell Heidi to post and she just laughs. Lacy tells me to post and so does Candy, so I'm posting, but no one comments anyway. And no one comments on my comments to their blogs, so what's the point with blogging. HB uses all my ideas on his Cougar Sportsline, so as Hitch says, "I've got nothing".
I've really got nothing to say. Chad is gone. I've got no one to go fishing with. It's hot, really hot. I hate one of my dogs and no one will take him. Everyone gets mad when I say I'm gonna take him out in the desert and let him play "Survivor". Incidentally, what a great TV show. I know some of it has to be fake, but it still appeals to my manly manifestoness. Speaker on entertainment, I've gone to more movies in the last month than I have in the last 10 years. All because Chad is gone. It's my way of grieving, I guess. Or maybe it's because Cameron likes to go and up until now he didn't have vehicle. So I went with him or with Pam. Here's my review of the following movies: Fantastic Four.....what a waste; Spiderman....good but too many villians; Pirates....enough with the psycho crabs, not enough action, yet Johnny Depp is a great actor...movie still stunk though; Transformers.....yeah baby....the real deal, although I have no idea which machines were good or bad, just great action and it was funny...the lead guy Beef or Broth or Shilo or whatever his name is (it's something like that) was good; Ocean's 13.....okay, allright good becuase I like the idea of ripping off anything in Vegas but the writing sure has gone downhill since the first one. I wanted it to be funny, but it wasn't, yet they ripped off Al Pacino and Andy Garcia again...okay kinda good but not...it was a good diversion. So here's a movie story for you. Pam, Cameron and I went to see Transformers the first day it was out. Not the midnite thing but day. We had to stand in line for 45 minutes behind some ropes to wait for it. I've never done anything like that before except at Disneyline and I hated it. Anyway, we are there for about a minute in line and Pam says she has to go the bathroom. So she goes. About 15 minutes passes and shes not back. I tell Cameron I'm worried and go to find her. I go to the women's bathroom and wait. Ladies are entering and exiting, but no Pam. Finally, I see someone from our ward coming out. I ask if Pam was in there. She says no. So I call Pam on her cell phone. I rings for a long time and finally she answers in a soft, whispering voice, "Whhhhaaaat"? I ask, "Where are you?" She whispers even softer, "I'm in another movie. I didn't want to stand in line that long and there was another movie I wanted to see if I liked".
She told me to call her when the line got to go to our theater. So this is how the movie thing works, I concluded. Cameron and I waited the entire time in this stupid line. So then we finally march, almost run to theater #19 and I call Pam. She said she'd be there when it started and to save her a seat. Now in her defense, she does have torn cartilage on both sides of her right knee, so I understand and we probably could have gotten a doctors note if had to. But, then I see throngs of people (all healthy) who all of sudden show up in our marching line in front of us beating us to the good seats. It seems that nobody actually waits in these lines. They just hide somewhere else and then magically appear at the front of the line to get the good seats. Some of these people had shaved heads and gang tatoos, so I decided not to confront them. Even so, we got the good seats, you know the ones with the railing in front so you can put your feet up. And, of course we still kept an empty seat between us saying they were taken if anybody was to ask. We did it out of spite to show the others that we were "bad".
Chad leaves for Hamburg in a couple of weeks. He says he can't wait. He's tired of the processed MTC food and ready to see some action.
I've really got nothing to say. Chad is gone. I've got no one to go fishing with. It's hot, really hot. I hate one of my dogs and no one will take him. Everyone gets mad when I say I'm gonna take him out in the desert and let him play "Survivor". Incidentally, what a great TV show. I know some of it has to be fake, but it still appeals to my manly manifestoness. Speaker on entertainment, I've gone to more movies in the last month than I have in the last 10 years. All because Chad is gone. It's my way of grieving, I guess. Or maybe it's because Cameron likes to go and up until now he didn't have vehicle. So I went with him or with Pam. Here's my review of the following movies: Fantastic Four.....what a waste; Spiderman....good but too many villians; Pirates....enough with the psycho crabs, not enough action, yet Johnny Depp is a great actor...movie still stunk though; Transformers.....yeah baby....the real deal, although I have no idea which machines were good or bad, just great action and it was funny...the lead guy Beef or Broth or Shilo or whatever his name is (it's something like that) was good; Ocean's 13.....okay, allright good becuase I like the idea of ripping off anything in Vegas but the writing sure has gone downhill since the first one. I wanted it to be funny, but it wasn't, yet they ripped off Al Pacino and Andy Garcia again...okay kinda good but not...it was a good diversion. So here's a movie story for you. Pam, Cameron and I went to see Transformers the first day it was out. Not the midnite thing but day. We had to stand in line for 45 minutes behind some ropes to wait for it. I've never done anything like that before except at Disneyline and I hated it. Anyway, we are there for about a minute in line and Pam says she has to go the bathroom. So she goes. About 15 minutes passes and shes not back. I tell Cameron I'm worried and go to find her. I go to the women's bathroom and wait. Ladies are entering and exiting, but no Pam. Finally, I see someone from our ward coming out. I ask if Pam was in there. She says no. So I call Pam on her cell phone. I rings for a long time and finally she answers in a soft, whispering voice, "Whhhhaaaat"? I ask, "Where are you?" She whispers even softer, "I'm in another movie. I didn't want to stand in line that long and there was another movie I wanted to see if I liked".
She told me to call her when the line got to go to our theater. So this is how the movie thing works, I concluded. Cameron and I waited the entire time in this stupid line. So then we finally march, almost run to theater #19 and I call Pam. She said she'd be there when it started and to save her a seat. Now in her defense, she does have torn cartilage on both sides of her right knee, so I understand and we probably could have gotten a doctors note if had to. But, then I see throngs of people (all healthy) who all of sudden show up in our marching line in front of us beating us to the good seats. It seems that nobody actually waits in these lines. They just hide somewhere else and then magically appear at the front of the line to get the good seats. Some of these people had shaved heads and gang tatoos, so I decided not to confront them. Even so, we got the good seats, you know the ones with the railing in front so you can put your feet up. And, of course we still kept an empty seat between us saying they were taken if anybody was to ask. We did it out of spite to show the others that we were "bad".
Chad leaves for Hamburg in a couple of weeks. He says he can't wait. He's tired of the processed MTC food and ready to see some action.
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